UNSPOKEN season of life

Its been a long long time never update this blog. So many things happened in my life.
Now, I wanna resume each chapters that I change me like a lot!

We live in a world where achievement, status, job, reputation, and money are the indicators of how successful we are. Everyone starts comparing each other. So do I. 

Why? Because they want to know who is better. Why? Because they want to be the better one. The question they ask is always "Who is richer?" or "Who did better?" or "Who has higher status?"

I fight with kind of that questions almost one year. Job world is not really fun like I thought before. Especially when you live in this kind of city. Competitive city named Jakarta!! LOL 

Well, we don't need to play by the rule of this city. The truth is, the most interesting people are those who can be the happiest, not the richest or the smartest. The happiest people don't need to ask "Who is happier?" Only insecured people always compare. They need acceptance from others to make sure they fulfill the expectation of the world.

Truly, from the deepest of my heart. I don't like this city, I change a lot here. Sometimes I cannot handle myself. I overwhelmed with something is not in me before. Getting busy with job and trying to collect achievements. But sometimes, I got upside down with my expectations.

And honestly, I am far away from the Creator. I feel like don't know Him well. What He want from me. But still I have learned to reach out just the same.

But I have to fight, fight to realize that I have a HAPPY DNA!

"Be happy always" is my tagline. Ups not only tagline but a lifestyle.

Happy people know how to enjoy every simple things in life no matter what people say, no matter what the world sees them. They don't need confirmation from others to make them officially happy. By the way, one day God whispered me by His calm words.. He said "you don't need to prove anything."Lovely sounds for my achievey soul.

You don't need to be the best. Just be the happiest.

So, in this UNSPOKEN season of life I wanna live happy. Not live best! :D Because when you happy, you will do your best .. 

 

New business :)

 HI PEOPLE!

This week has been a very exciting one for me because I sounding my pastry brand at the entire world *not really*! its all about sudden thing happens like miracle! after 6 days im thinking about how to make this sudden business become a serious one. SUDDENLY, one investor come and take me to the serious meeting. I called him a coaches because he knows about business. We flew in to learn all about our upcoming I<3ny about="" almost="" and="" are="" because="" break="" budgets="" business="" cam="" camera="" country="" down="" educating="" every="" exciting="" front="" handy="" his="" in="" indonesia.="" innovations.="" inspires="" is="" led="" lines="" me="" month="" my="" nbsp="" on.="" on="" p="" passionate="" pastry="" people="" product.="" so="" spreading="" team="" the="" they="" week="">
Here we go again,
last night I got a nice dream.
God seems show me how I got Paris dreams.
I remember one pattern, one formula that I always use.

Nike + Holy Spirit = Paris.

And now, I will continueously walk on that formula.

Happy holiday guys!

Waiting at the right stop

Sebuah nilai yang saya tidak pernah tahu berapa angkanya. Hanya Bapa yang tahu yang melihat apakah nilai saya merah atau memuaskan.

Hari ini saya berencana pergi ke Sentul untuk mengunjungi kakak perempuan saya di sana. Saya belum pernah menaiki shuttle bus yang orang2 bilang bisa mengantar saya ke tempat tujuan saya.

Saya mencari tahu semua rute nya, saya agak khawatir karena satu bulan laku saya menunggu bus ini dan harus menunggu begitu lama dan akhirnya saya naik bus lain, saya menjauhi bus tujuan saya.

Hari ini saya kembali mencoba menunggu. Namun sudah setengah jam saya menunggu, dan bus tak kunjung datang. Saya menelpon customer service tapi tidak diangkat2, tanya orang2 jawabannya bermacam2.. Ada yang bilang tidak lewat, ada yang bilang salah halte namun ada yang menenangkan saya dengan berkata "tunggu saja.."

Saya resah, cemas. Saya sedikit kesal dengan berkata dalam hati "kayagini lagi deh, menunggu lagi, cape." SAYA SIBUK DENGAN KERESAHAN SAYA, sampai saya malas memperhatikan jalan karena banyak asap kendaraan, khawatir, dll.

Dan yang indah indah adalah ketika orang di sebelah saya berkata "mba, itu bus nya mba datang.." wahhhhhh tiba2 muka orang itu seperti malaikat, padahal saya ga kenal LOL 

Semua keresahan saya seketika hilang, kelelahan saya menunggu hilang dan saya punya banyak pelajaran mahal dari sini.

Saya pernah menunggu dan tidak mendapatkan apa yang saya tunggu. Saya tidak salah halte, hanya keputusan saya yang membuat saya tidak menunggu lagi. SAYA MENJAUHI HALTE SAYA.

Sekali lagi ketika saya diminta untuk menunggu, saya menunggu, ketika itu tidak kunjung datang saya telpon customer care kan. Mirip sama kita yang ketika menunggu sesuatu dalam hidup, kita tanya semua orang, kita "telpon" surga, bahkan marah2 kenapa "bus" kita ga datang2, kenapa apa yang kita nantikan ga datang2. Ketika bertanya kepada orang-orang di sekitar kita, jawaban mereka berbeda.. Mungkin ada yang berkata, stay! You're almost there. Tapi ga sedikit yang bilang, leave it.. Its not worth to be waited. THIS PUBLIC OPINION SOMETIMES MAKE US CONFUSE. but you just need to ask God. Only Him knows when your bus will coming.

Dan kalau saat pertama saya menunggu, saya pergi menjauh dari bus yang saya tunggu, kali ini saya tahu KASIH KARUNIA MENDEKATI HIDUP SAYA. Busnya trtap datang walau saya agak kesal hahaha 

GRACE IS God doing for what we could never do and what we never deserve.

Respon saya masih sama kok, saya resah kan, cemas, takut. 

Tapi kenapa Tuhan begitu baik walaupun saya ga layak, yes ITS ONLY BY GRACE.

Kuncinya juga, menunggu lah di halte yang tepat. Di halte di mana bus berisi mimpimu, cita2 dan harapanmu pasti datang. Bus surgawi yang siap mengantarmu e tempat terindah yang belum pernah kamu lihat. 

Jangan menjauh dari halte itu, alangkah lebih baik jika menantikan bus itu sambil memeluk kasih karunia. It will be so happier moment :)

Be happy always -NY- 

mendekati matahari

Hai matahari, pagi ini aku bahagia melihatmu!

Bahagia, kembali menyadari sumber kehangatan yang kurasakan di kala kuberjalan..

Ternyata kau ada.
Engkau nyata.

Cukup dingin di sini sehingga sinarmu saja tak cukup menghangatkan..
 
Terkadang aku takut. Entah mengapa aku takut melihatmu dari kedekatan..
Namun,

aku membutuhkanmu..
aku berpikir..

Bagaimana aku bisa KESANA

ke tempatmu yang jauh..

Kupejamkan mataku
aku berkata  dalam benakku..

aku ingin melihatmu..
Dan aku mengarahkan mataku sejajar dengan posisimu..

HANGAT..
INDAHJ..
BERCAHAYA..

Bukan di mataku.. tapi di dalam mataku.
di dalam bayanganku yang dipantulkan sinarmu.

Sampai kapanpun, mungkin aku tak bisa meraihmu
bahkan memelukmu.
Namun, aku bisa mendekatimu..
Dengan hatiku
Matahari!

be happy WHEREVER you are!

Happy hectic Monday everyone!  I apologize for my lack of posting this week!  Waiting for life to slow down a little bit! And now, its my time to spread my happy go lucky atmosphere to you! Anyways, not often do we reflect on where we are in life, as we are too busy going through it. When we're young (on high school) its like we are constantly one step ahead of ourselves. For me personally, when I was in school, I couldn't wait to be in college. When I was single, I couldn't wait to be double *ups, name it married ya!

When I was in Bandung, I really wanna go to Jakarta! HA HA *admit it Nike* 

But now, suddenly.  Here I am - college graduate, still single anyway :/, at Jakarta now.  All the years behind me gone to memories.  All the years ahead, waiting to be revealed.  And my present, up for grabs.

Thinking back on it, I loved my childhood and I loved my days in school.  Coming home at 1p.m. and watching TV , or running outside playing sports with my teammates and friends was the bomb.  I loved the freedom of being on my own, and knowing that my life is yet to be written.  And I even loved that tiny, uncomplicated, one bedroom dorm/renthouse.

So, why do we rush it away?  Why don't we fully appreciate the exact place we are in?  No matter how messy, or crazy, or even, how beautiful it is?

All I know is, at one point or another in our lives, we'll cross that line of looking forward, to looking back.  Looking back at a life rushed away, because we were too busy trying to get somewhere we thought would make us happier.  Except, when we get there, are we happy?

Happy exists, only if we allow it to exist. Its a thought, not necessarily some form of reality. Its not our situation, its our thoughts.

I think that's one of the hardest lessons in life. To be content, wherever you are. Even harder? To be HAPPY wherever you are!!! <3 br="br" ny="ny">

Be silent and hear the clinks ..

Morning.. I wake up with mixed feelings today. I'm not in the good situation. #lesigh

I wanna say that I'm not find new community yet. Community who can make mw feel secure, make it simple.. Like community in Bandung, ECC.
I miss my cell group, I miss my daddy, I miss being someone who can cheers them up even when I am down and then I got my power back!

Here, in this week I found new friends. and will find more.. And, this week was very special because I met many actress, important people, and my idol. They makes me feel like I am nothing, and so hard to explain lah.
If you join new community, you need to know what they like, and realize or no you will be like them if you always play with them.

like on Thursday, I went home at 4 a.m. What a black night! -_-

I'm guilty.
I had fun anyway, they are funny, creative, hard worker people. I'm proud to join them. But, something bad happen. I lost my solitude with my creator. WORST!

I need to come back. And He always gimme a way to back home.

"Hear the clinks.." He said..

Sometimes, Tuhan menyembunyikan sesuatu seperti menyembunyikan sebuah jam. Kita disuruh mencari jam itu disebuah ruangan. Saat kita cari kadang kita terlalu banyak bergerak, terlalu banyak bicara dan terlalu berisik dengan hal-hal lain. "Mana yah jam nya, mana nih kok ga ketemu-ketemu."

Sampai akhirnya kita menyerah!
But, God say.. "Sssttttt.. Be silent, and hear the clinks!"

Saat kita diam, kita bisa denger kan detik jam itu. Dan dengan mudah kita menemukan jam tersebut.

I know, He always there. He always good. He always with me! Your love always makes me better!

Thank you my only one exception.

Keep Calm and Don't GIVE UP!

Hi there, these day was a very busy days in my life! *drama*
Yet, I'm so excited for this new season of life.. New environment, new friends, new office, new job!

At first day of working, I went to PSSI (Persatuan Sepakbola Seluruh Indonesia), met new people (and all man) -.-"
Arrived at renthouse at 10 p.m.
Second day, I went to Menpora. I met Andi Malarangeng, my idol. He was so kind and warm, not like Djohar (Ketum PSSI). And talked with Timo Scheunemann as a coach for U-12 team who went to Polandia for Danone Cup.

Today, I finish my class with Ibu Sumita Tobing. She is so awesome woman~ She can dance, she can edit movie, she know many things!
But, this is very deep sentence from her at class
"Nike, suara kamu itu tipis sekali.. Jadi agak cempreng untuk ukuran presenter news. Kamu harus ngomong pakai suara perut bukan suara hidung."

Then, she teach me how to breathe from stomach.
To be honest, I'm a bit down. Voice is a grace from God, right? So, practice to change my voice is an effort.
and this morning my friend's statement on Twitter scared me. He said " 1 grace is louder than 1,000 efforts."

VOICE = GRACE

PRACTICE = EFFORT

Clear? Then, I have a strong reason to give up here. In my new world. But, I tell you! I WON'T!!!!

Calm,  I think everybody has their own problem ya. Maybe your problem is different from other people's, but I'm sure everyone has something they struggle with..

What I'm trying to say is, it's okay if your life is not perfect (your voice maybe not good, your body, your hair, your physically, etc). And I believe that nobody has a perfect life. What you need is not a perfect life, but a happy life. And to live that happy life, you don't need to be perfect. You just need to deal with your imperfection. Don't give up. Don't quit. Be thankful! You can still enjoy your life.

The bad news is, your life will never be perfect. The good news is, you don't need a perfect life to be happy.

The problem with many people is, they think they don't deserve to be happy because they're imperfect!! That's wrong. You'll never enjoy your life if you set your mind like that. Just because your life isn't like what you want it to be, doesn't mean you can't enjoy it.
Your life may not be easy, but you can still live it well. Life is how you make it to be. Be thankful for your life even though it's not perfect. There's always something to be thankful for, no matter what. Once you know how to live with your imperfection, you realize that life isn't that bad.

So, always remind yourself that it's okay not to be perfect. It doesn't mean you can't have a good life! Keep learning to improve yourself ya :p

See ya! XOXO